I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
