My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
