just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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