Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
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