I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
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