white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
