ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
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