My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
