U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
