he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
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