drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
