I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
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