He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Randomize
