make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize