nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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