we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize
