Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
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