Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
