we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
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