Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Randomize
