You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize