I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
