haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Randomize