He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
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