he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
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M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
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