He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize