He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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