You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.