You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
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