So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Randomize
