Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
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