Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
You're a waste of cheezeits
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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