we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
sex in a hospital.. check
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