The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
