Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Couch. On fire.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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