Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
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