its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
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