its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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