My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
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