Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
There are leaves in my underwear?
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
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