When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize