Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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