we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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