I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
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