I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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