once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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