He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Randomize