is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
