She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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