His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
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